i should probably piont out that was for the movie insight.
unless you're ignoring me here are some more films that you can intelligently critique
http://www.ddpictures.com/intuition
i do hope this doesn't waste anyone's time [img]graemlins/shhh.gif[/img]
i should probably piont out that was for the movie insight.
number 1 rule of movie making... there has to be a conflict for us to give a rats arse. This movie has no conflict what so ever.
It fails to tell me anything about the girl or the people she kills. And while it might be an interesting piont for us not to know who the girl is or what her background it then we at least need to know why she has killed them or who she has killed. Again getting back the piont of having a conflict.
Stylisticly the movie is good, there are some interesting shots and it generaly has some "cool factor", but its not enough to save what is ultimately a piontless film. Even a 60 second movie needs a 3 part structure.
Viewed as an excuse to show a pretty girl in a white dress, smeared in blood carrying guns for some psuedo erotic, cool shots then sure this movie is great. But viewed in a more objective way then it gets a [img]graemlins/thumbs_down.gif[/img]
the fact you waste a good 5 seconds of your already very tight 60 second time in having nothing but sound which for me, didnt add anything didnt seem like very good time management. Its ironic that that best bit for me was the moody first shot with the girl on the stairs with the mood music, which didnt actually say anything or do anything other than look cool.
Im not sure if im allowed to replie, considering im not abbot but i would liek to comment on insight.
What exatly was happening? A girl in a white dress appears from static electricity (i liked the effects), then wehave a 10 seconds toilet brake and it starts flashing blood and things that are to short to get peoples attention, ending with a girl in blood getting up an dwalking... Wow that was amazing. You pulled off a story with no plot, no characetrs, no storyline, nothing, zilch.
"Im gonna make a film about a chick in white killing people, but it will be unique cause it will include a 10 second toilet brake"..
I dont think so.
Advice: Write a script...
don't really want to get into another huge topic about my films again so i will just answer your points with my point of view as the film maker (just as a side note this is the 60 second version, there is an extended version with longer ending):
conflict: a woman is scared(?), alone and suddenly the lights are turned out and she is about to be attacked. that is my interpretation.
knowing who it is she killed/who she is: this was the point of the film to present this character and leave the audience to decide who she is who she is killing and why.
3 acts: i don't really pretend at this but here's a way to do it: act 1 up to when lights turn out act 2: up till you find there is someone still alive. act 3: the rest, although it is more in depth in the extended.
toilet break: with your volume loud enough (it is mixed properly so its not the films fault!) the darkness is accompanied by audio, doors opening, whispering etc.
but i appreciate your points and i hope you appreciate my responses! thank you
oh and it is an open thread, so anyone can throw in their eight cents(!) worth
conflict:
three mother fuckers got shot in the face
thats a solution.. get the two right, and you might have a decent short sometime [img]biggrin.gif[/img]
<font color="#a62a2a" size="1">[ February 09, 2004 07:17 PM: Message edited by: Christian Marcussen ]</font>
I watched it again and i was impressed with the sound at Full-Ball. But I still found the movie made little sense to me.
She litrally appered at the start inside a stairway of sorts, then lights go out and we hear her enter another room, whisper and then we see blood and bodies flashed at us in short intervals, followed by the same girl who appeared in the stairway covered in blood and holding a gun.
I feel there isnt enough strength there, you litrally have to guess at the storyline, or interpret it your own way. I feel as a filmmaker, it is our job to tell stories not make the audienc guess the story even after the film has ended.
I would like to see the extended version, but i still find the short version makes little sense.
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I think you will be hard pressed to find people who watch what i saw and come to that conclusion. This is what i saw...conflict: a woman is scared(?), alone and suddenly the lights are turned out and she is about to be attacked. that is my interpretation.
A woman stands at the foot or some stairs. It cuts to black, we hear some doors creak open and such. We see some flashes of people being shot, it cuts to the girl stood holding guns.
Now where in those shots does it tell the audience that the lights have been turned out? Where does it say she has been attacked? If i had to read anything into it I would say she attacked them, becos you show her at the start with menacing music.
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I dont pretend to be an expert in screen writing but the 3 acts goes something like... present a group of characters and a problem they must solve, show them solving the problem, show the resolution of those problems. What you have is a random shot of a girl, some sound effects, some people die, a shot of a girl holding guns. I appreciate you are trying to defend something you put your time and effort in but i dont think you are going to persuade anyone with any film theory knowledge that this movie has any sort of conflict or plot or depth. In a way its quite interesting the way people could interpret these very uninformative almost randonly put together shots and sounds, but as anything entertaining it sadly fails to engage me and it looks like im not alone.3 acts: i don't really pretend at this but here's a way to do it: act 1 up to when lights turn out act 2: up till you find there is someone still alive. act 3: the rest, although it is more in depth in the extended.
If i was to offer you some advice i would say go away and write something that doesnt involve guns, aim for a 5 minute time frame and invent a conflict and a character to over come it. It neednt be defeat an army of aliens or something, conflict can just be that you have locked your keys inside the car or have run out of toilet paper mid-ass-wipe. Write something that is going to engage the audience. Film it.
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